Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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