You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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