watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
