shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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