it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
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