WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
