So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
we made out on top of his cat.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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