you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
