I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize