can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Randomize
