ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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