Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
