Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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