i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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