anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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