All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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