at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize