Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I am available for nakedness
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
