wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
