We're like a lot better than the average bears
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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