I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Randomize
