im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
