dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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