I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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