I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
