He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
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