It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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