I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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