This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
