with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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