i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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