Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Congratulations! We have a period
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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