So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Drunk is a universal language darling
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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