I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
