so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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