you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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