No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
