worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
