Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
did you just send me my own nude
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
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