i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize
