I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
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