I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize