forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
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