Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
