a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize