i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
