quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
