Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
