Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
This girl is more easily done than said...
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Randomize
