So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
