Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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